Mayor-E-O!?

If you follow my blog (thank you for being so damn awesome) you know that I’m not much of a negative person.  I’m really not.  I mostly joke around and make fun of things a la MST3K.  It’s just what I do, and what I have always done.  My wife’s recently made her peace with it, yet she still won’t watch Vampire Diaries with me after I riffed the shit out of an episode.

They’re just so adorable, how could you not hate them?

However, I went to a Game Stop today because a guy I know works there who’s helping me get back the DS games I lost recently, and he had three I really wanted back: Ivy the Kiwi?, Ninjatown, and another I will disclose in a later post.  He was holding them for me until I got off work.  Naturally, I was totally pumped and in an extremely good mood the whole day.  When quittin’ time finally came around, I got the hell out of there and went to Game Stop.  Nothing could bring me down from this high.  Nothing but THIS guy:

Not really.  I never met this guy, but I’m sure I’d hate him.

The guy I’m talking about is some customer who was standing at the counter talking to my friend.  He was a normal-enough looking guy, but he had the audacity to look at me while I was purchasing my games and say, “You played the new Mayor-E-O game yet?  I hear it’s fun.”  At first, I had no idea what this guy was talking at me.  Mayor-E-O… Mayor-E-O…  I eventually took the bait and asked, “What’s that?”

He laughed contemptuously.  “What are you, stupid?  Mayor-E-O!”  He slowed down his speech and enunciated each syllable so that my tiny little brain could figure out what he was saying.  “Oh my god, dude!  He’s the plumber who fights Bowser!  Has a green brother named Luigi!”

“Oh, Mario!  Hell, yeah I played the new Mario!  It’s pretty kick ass.”

“Yeah, I’ve been playing Mayor-E-O since I was a little tyke.  I love me some Mayor-E-O.”

At that point I was pretty sure he was trying to piss me off.  Why would he keep saying his name wrong?  Why so many times in such a short span?  “You know it’s pronounced ‘Mario,’ right?”

“Mario, Mayor-E-O.  It’s the same thing.”

I decided murder would be a terrible thing to do in public and promptly exited the store because now I can say something I’ve always wanted to say: I’m going to blog about this sooooo hard when I get home!

To the internet!

I make it a point to never correct anyone’s colloquial speech, grammar, or pronunciation.  I find it to be degrading, pretension, and just damn mean sometimes; however, I do have a problem with pronunciation when it comes to proper nouns.  In this case, Mario.  It’s common knowledge that his name is pronounced “Mario” and not “Mayor-E-O.”  If you know a guy named Mario, and he says his name is Mayor-E-O, that’s perfectly cool.  But Mario is “Mario” and should be addressed as such. What if you told me your name was Tommy and I called you Toe-me?  You’d think I was retarded or something because you’re name isn’t Toe-me.  No one’s is.  People like to be called by their actually name is all I’m saying.  Also, Exhibit A.

In that vid, the freaking voice of Mario himself says “Mario.”  Technically, he rolls his “R,” and it kind of sounds like an “L,” but it’s definitely not “Mayor-E-O,” that’s for damn sure!  And he’s not the only “official” person to say it correctly.  Reggie Fils-Aime pronounces it “Mario,” so do Iwata and Miyamoto.

Official Mario Pronunciation Committee meeting underway.

Actually, now that I think of it, Iwata and Miyamoto make the “R” sound like an “L,” too.  That makes 3 out of 4 Mario officials pronouncing it “Mar-lio.”  Holy crap!  Using my own iron-clad logic, I’ve discovered that I’ve been saying his name wrong!  Oh, the shame I’ve brought upon my family!  I suppose I can at least find solace in the fact that I never pronounced it “Mayor-E-O.”  That would be stupid…

Seriously, it’s-a “Mario.”  “Mayor-E-O” is wrong and awful.  Cut that shit out, people.

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